I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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