what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
