The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
where am i from again
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
