I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
