Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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