worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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