i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
