Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize