Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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