In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
