Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
