Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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