You work out of a Hotel?
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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