she was so not down for the gang bang
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
I'm really busy with my period
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