I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
my shit smells like andre
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
God I need to hump something, right now.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
