C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize