I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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