sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
