doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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