even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
