Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Randomize
