I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
