Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize