God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Randomize
