I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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