ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Randomize
