ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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