nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Randomize