yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
