every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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