I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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