Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
