pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
