Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
