Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize