Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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