Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Randomize