capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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