Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Randomize
