ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
This is classic penis vs brain.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Bring me that man meat
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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