We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
50% drunk capacity currently
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Randomize