Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
