Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
