is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
