He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
