Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
