By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
