"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
