i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Just high enough for therapy.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Randomize
