The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
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