I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
