Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
