thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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