I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
be right there i have to get my cape
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize
